Steve & Betty

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Archive for the tag “peace”

“The Red Balloon”

For most of my life I remember that my maternal grandmother, Mae Horton, had difficulty walking. Her knees were not cooperative in a day when knee replacement surgery was only experimental and not overly successful. Granny eventually ended up in a wheel chair. This immobility did not stop Granny however, her mind was forever in motion and she did not stop learning, loving and reaching. Granny ruled from her favorite chair. We all knew that Granny was in charge, including sweet Grandaddy. What Granny said went and NO one dared to dispute her. In spite of her dictatorial matriarchal rule, we all loved Granny and we KNEW she loved us.

My baby sister, Brenda, and I spent a great deal of time with Granny and Grandaddy from the time we were born. Our paternal grandparents had died before our father and mother were married, so we never knew them. Granny and Grandaddy Horton lovingly filled this void. In 1987 I moved to Central Florida and my visits were limited due to the distance. My sister continued to see Granny and Grandaddy regularly, as she lived less than 2 miles from them on Florida’s East Coast. Brenda and Granny had always been extremely close, as she helped my Mama care for Brenda when she was born. My Mama was not well for awhile after Brenda’s birth and I was only 18 months at the time and still required much care myself. Their relationship was magnetic. Brenda was in and out of Granny’s house throughout the week and always stopped in if she was going shopping to see if Granny and Grandaddy needed anything.

You would think from the previous paragraphs that this is going to be about Granny and it partially is, but not solely. This is about my sister, who loved and lived and longed to stretch her wings and fly from the time I first recall recognizing her as a person. This is also the story of the “Red Balloon”.

Twenty years ago and prior to my Granny’s death, Brenda had a wonderfully amazingly imaginative dream.

In the dream she was pushing Granny in her wheelchair down the walkway in front of Granny’s house. She was taking her for a “walk” around the neighborhood. It was a perfectly beautiful day. The sky was bright blue and almost cloudless, except for a few cottony clouds floating in on the eastern breeze from the Atlantic Ocean, less than a mile away. Brenda and Granny were enjoying this special time together and looking up in to the sky. About the same time they both noticed a tiny red dot descending. As the dot came closer and grew larger they realized that it was a balloon with a string attached. It was the type of balloon that our children were always given when we shopped for groceries at Publix; they were filled with helium and had a ribbon attached for holding onto. It was odd that this Red Balloon was descending instead of ascending, however. All the balloons we had seen before would ascend if not firmly grasped in our children’s sweet little hands. Many balloons were lost in the Publix parking lot.

This Red Balloon continued it’s descent until it was directly in front of Granny. In childlike awe, Granny reached out and grasped the ribbon. Immediately she and the Red Balloon began to ascend. Brenda watched helplessly as Granny and the Red Balloon begin their ascent into the Stratosphere and disappeared. Before Brenda could become totally frantic, she saw the slightly larger dot begin to descend once again. As it drew closer she could see that Granny was still grasping the ribbon. Slowly the descent continued until Granny, clutching the Red Balloon, was standing in front of the wheelchair. Granny then released the Red Balloon to continue it’s return through the layers of atmosphere, walked wordlessly, easily and painlessly to the back of the wheelchair and pushed it back into the house. Granny’s knees were completely whole after her mysterious and wonderful ascent into the ‘heavens’ .”

Although in actuality, Granny’s knees were not whole, this dream was a lovely gift to both Brenda and Granny. Brenda shared the dream with Granny and it tickled her. Granny had a fantastic sense of humor and adventure. I believe that often Dreams are God’s communication with us and this Special Dream gave Brenda a peace about the hereafter that she had not known prior to receiving this “heaven sent video”.

Brenda became widowed almost 4 years ago. Her “Mr. Bill” was the “love of her life”. And after losing him the void was fathomless. My sister had also been quite ill herself for many years, and with each passing year she grew more twisted with crippling scoliosis, causing her organs to become compressed and damaged. She was a truly gifted artist and her home was filled with paintings and sketches of paintings she planned to do, but her body failed her before she could complete the ideas she had stored in her brain and on post-it-notes throughout her house. Grasping a brush or a charcoal pencil for any length of time had become excruciatingly painful. But like Granny, her mind never stopped creating beauty.

On July 28, 2016, I received the most horrible phone call that I had received to date; my Brenny had died. I was overwhelmed with grief and intense loneliness. My seemingly “forever sobs” were deep and ragged. The one remaining person who knew me best and longest was gone and I would never be able to share another “sister moment” with her.

But God is Good, as the movie, “God’s not Dead”, reminds, “all the time”. So while sitting in a chair in my Brenny’s house a few days after she had died, God granted me a sweet gift of the reminder of the “Red Balloon”. In the twenty years since my sister dreamed of the Red Balloon and Granny, she had been through so very much, physically, mentally and emotionally, but on Thursday, July 28th, 2016, I believe she reached up and grasped her own Red Balloon and left all that behind. The last text she attempted to send in the moments prior to her leaving this earth was, “Oh I see…”. Obviously I will never know what she truly saw, but I choose to believe it was her own “Red Balloon” and that she grasped it with the childlike delight she possessed in everything she attempted right up to the very end of her earthly life. 

Red Balloons.php

On Sunday , August 7th 2016, a group of Family and Friends released red balloons into a blue, cottony clouded sky in her honor. I know Brenny would have been applauding with glee.

When Life Happens….

It has been too long since either Steve or I have shared here. Unfortunately, life has caused us to not always be available to put “pen to thought”. I feel challenged to once again begin sharing with those of you who wish to follow our journey with this Eulogy I was privileged to share at my mother’s Celebration of her Life in June 2015. I pray you are encouraged.

 

 

Betty Joyce Horton Stallings
b 7/4/1931-d 6/10/2015

Our Mother, Betty Joyce Horton Stallings, was born on the 4th of July, 1931. As a child she always thought that the fireworks and other celebrations were in recognition of her birthday. To be honest, my sister, Brenda and I wondered why our birthday celebrations never compared to Mama’s.

I am glad she had those special thoughts, because coming from a family that did not have a great deal of monetary wealth, she learned early that if she wanted something that was not in the family budget she had to work for it. When she wanted a bicycle she sold watermelons. She even commissioned her friends to sell for her and receive a percentage of the profits. She baby sat, weeded gardens and grew and sold vegetables to purchase a trumpet. Her efforts enabled her to buy such a nice trumpet that the other band students begged to play it.

From the beginning it was obvious that Mama’s skills were not in the areas of normally accepted domesticity for her era. If Brenda and I needed something sewn, Big Granny would be our go-to-person. Mama didn’t bake cakes, so our birthday cakes came from Langbehn’s Bakery. But she could take a piece of wood and with her band saw and imagination create magical things, including our slingshots and rubber-band guns, which made us the envy of all our friends. She was an expert marksman and with her 22 rifle, which was an anniversary present from Daddy, she kept our yard on 45th Street free of venomous snakes. Mama was Daddy’s right hand when it came to preparing the cars he painted in his Automotive and Paint and Body Garage. She had a light touch and could smooth out the surface of the cars so that you would never be able to tell where the damage had been. Because of Mama, Brenda and I grew up knowing that we could do and be whatever we desired. Nothing was labeled as being just for girls or just for boys. Mama was truly ahead of her time.

If you knew Mama you know that she had a very special relationship with Jesus. Consequently, I can not share anything about Mama without including Him. Mama began following Jesus at a very young age. She began practicing her faith as a young girl by sitting the family dogs down and teaching them about Jesus’ love and encouraging them to receive Him as their Lord. I imagine there was a little “Hellfire and Brimstone” thrown in to keep their attention. As she grew up there was less “Hellfire and Brimstone” and more love. She wanted everyone to know the Love of Christ and receive Him as their own personal Lord and Savior. She taught Sunday School, Children’s Church, and led Youth Group. She facilitated Bible Studies in group settings and as a one-on-one mentor.

My Mama would be the first to say that she was not a “Saint” and that anything that was good in her was because of her placing her trust in Jesus. While in Junior High I told a classmate that my mother was perfect. The classmate said that was impossible, nobody was perfect. I very quickly told her that she was wrong according to Matthew 5:48, that reads, “Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”
I have since learned the true meaning of that verse and that my Mama was not perfect, but one of the things I loved about her so much and strive to immolate, is how easily she loved others. She was one of the least judgmental people I know. She believed her assignment as a Believer was to share the Love of Jesus to all she met, but allow Jesus to do the changing. I personally am a recipient of her non-judgmental love.

My Mama was an anointed and gifted writer. Many of you have been recipients of her letters/epistles, but she would be the first to say that she was only the Scribe for the words that Holy Spirit revealed to her. Much of the material that she used in Childrens’ Church and Youth Group was original. But every time she put pen to paper to write a letter, story, poem or song she felt humbled to be chosen to share God’s message.

Before we could read for ourselves Brenda and I learned much of what we know of the Lord at our Mama’s knees, looking at pictures and listening to stories from our Family Bible. One of the most important things she taught us is that the Church is not a building or a denomination. Instead it is the people who are Followers of Christ who make up the Church. When I was still in elementary school my Mama was inspired to right a song about this very thing. These are the words from the chorus.

“Take me out of the Ivory Towers,
From behind the Stained-glass windows,
From off the Plush pews.
Let me walk among the people, as I use to do.
The world is looking for reality.
They’ll only find that in me,
But only as they see me in you.”

If Mama was standing before us today she would sing these words in her beautiful vibrato alto voice and encourage each of us to live in such a way that the world can feel and see Christ’s Love. Mama’s earthly journey is over, but her legacy lives on in each of us who knew and loved her.

In closing I wish to share John 14:27, a verse that meant so much to Mama. Those who received letters from her would recognize it as one that she often wrote on the back of her envelopes for all who came in contact with them to see.
“Peace I leave with you, Peace I give unto you: not as the World giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.”

Shalom,

Betty

 

One Candle

Imagine finding yourself sitting in a small dark windowless room…..void of all light, completely black. You can not see anything in that room and as you sit there you can almost physically feel the weight of the darkness as it surrounds you. Then you realize that you are holding a candle in one hand and a match in the other. You strike the match against the floor, light the candle and the darkness retreats. The light brings you a sense of peace, hope and joy. You are now able to find your way out of the room.

This world with all of its seemingly insurmountable problems; war, disease, famine, economic decline and each individuals own personal problems, can create a very dark atmosphere much like that dark room.  Could this be why Jesus said to his believers  not to  hide our light, but to put it on a lamp stand where it can be seen by all? (1)  I was privileged to witness one of those lights being used to dispel darkness the other day. It encouraged me, but it also challenged me.

I had to go out of town the other morning and as I was returning I realized I needed gas , so I pulled into a station.  I went into the store and got into the gas line to pre-pay.  I was the third person in line.  The first person was a young woman carrying a small baby, next was a middle-aged man and then myself.

The young woman had counted out  stacks of coins: pennies, nickles, dimes and a few quarters and placed them on the counter. The cashier counted them and it appeared to me that the man in front of me was becoming a little impatient.  When the cashier completed counting the coins, the young woman left to pump her gas.

The man in line ahead of me now stepped up to the counter to pay for his gas with a large bill. The cashier rang up his gas purchase and started to  hand him the change, but he said, “No, put that in that young lady’s car.”  I guess I had misread his concern for impatience.

I watched as he walked out of the store. He walked over to the pump where the young woman was pumping gas and spoke with her. I assumed to let her know to continue pumping gas into her car until it stopped.   The cashier said, “You don’t see that very often.” and I agreed with her. We both had witnessed a beautiful example of compassion. We had seen a candle lit in this young woman’s darkness by a perfect stranger.

As I walked out of the store, the young woman had just finished pumping her gas and the man was nowhere to be seen. I could tell that the young woman had been deeply touched by this strangers act of kindness.

Yes, it only takes one lit candle to chase the darkness out of a room, but what if all of our candles were lit……… what would that look like?

 

Shalom…………..Steve

(1) Matthew 5:14,15

Weeds

I originate from a long line of people who made their living digging in the dirt. Although, unlike the previous farmers in my family, I do not have to do it to put food on the table, still my greatest solace is found in the simple act of digging in the dirt. I find something so rewarding about the instant transformation that occurs when weeds are pulled and shrubs are trimmed. It brings peace and tranquility to my often chaotic world. Those of you who work in landscaping may know what I’m talking about. However, this summer my garden has given me much trouble in the maintenance department and has offered a lesson in the spiritual realm as well.

Suddenly I have weeds that are unlike any weeds I’ve seen in my yard in the 23 years that I have lived in this house. They are the most tenacious weeds that I have yet to wage war on. They come out fairly easily, but where one was, three return. Resulting in a thick ground cover of weeds. I’ve used all kinds of weed killer in addition to manually removing them. I even have my husband, Steve, down on his hands and knees pulling weeds, as they’re just too many for one person to handle.

One of the problems is the massive amount of rain that we have recently received. Also, due to the fact we have not had time to fill the beds with a thick layer of mulch once the weeds are removed. This second reason is the one the Lord has used to teach me a tremendous lesson. I would like to share it with you.

In Luke 11:24-26 and also in Matthew 12:43-45, Jesus taught a parable about this very problem. He said, “ When an evil spirit goes out of someone it hunts for another place to rest. If it is unable to find a place, it will say to itself, ‘ I will return to the place I was’. Well in it’s absence the owner of the “house” has cleaned it and now it is even more inviting, so the evil spirit rounds up seven of it’s buddies and they all move in. Now the house is in worse shape than ever.”

This parable had always troubled me because I couldn’t understand that if the owner of the house had done all he or she could to clean the house, why would the evil spirits be allowed to return? Hadn’t they done their part? While kneeling in the dirt, filling numerous black trash bags with weeds, I received my answer. No they had not. They had neglected to fill the empty space with good things; things that would protect the house from being re-invaded. In my case, had I taken the time to follow the age-old trick of laying a layer of newspaper down and then a 2-inch layer of mulch on top of that I would have virtually eliminated my weed problem.

I have struggled this summer with a few spiritual weed re-invasions of my own. I’ve dealt with the spirit of depression, sadness and anxiety. These are spirits that I’ve fought before and succeeded in driving away, so why had they returned? The answer was really very simple. I had neglected to fill the empty spaces in myself with good things. I had often neglected my daily bible reading, prayer time, praise music, bible study and the support of Christian friends.

I had a good excuse too. I was busy pulling endless acres of weeds. What little time I had left I filled with empty things that left me unprotected against the spirits that knew my weaknesses very well. The things I filled my time with weren’t bad things; movies, novels and TV. But they were kind of like the weed killer and endless weed pulling that I had used to eliminate the natural weeds in my garden, okay, but not lastingly beneficial. Because I was left uncovered by a thick layer of spiritual “mulch”, I allowed spiritual “weeds” to take root.

I wonder if you may have been experiencing any spiritual weed invasions of your own?

Shalom, Betty

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